14 Dec 2015
If you work for a corporation there will come a time when you end up with a boss that you don’t get alone with. When this happens it is bad for both you & your boss as well as those you work with. After all, you are at work eight hours a day or more, 40 hours a week or more. You actually may have more face to face time with your boss than you do your spouse or kids. Think about this, by the time you say good bye to your spouse in the morning and maybe see them prior to going to bed at night that may equal six interrupted hours between kids, fixing dinner and general household responsibilities. You and your boss are dedicated to each other through out most of your eight hour day in some form or another either through meetings, emails, passing each other in the hall, phone calls, etc.
As you know while I am building up my full time coaching and blogging business I am still working a full time job. I am embarrassed to admit that over the last several years I have been in a situation where my boss and I have been a bit at odds. It has nothing to do with job performance. It has to do with how he treats his staff, not just me but his whole team, a team with over 65 years of combined professional engineering experience. He disrespects us professionally as well as personally, attempts to pit one team member against another, is unable to give a compliment without pointing out a failure in the same breath. I could go on but I think you probably get the idea.
So what do you do in this type of situation? Well, I’ll admit there have been times, over the last several years, that I have not handled the situation well as I should have. I have let him get to me; I have been negative and even voiced that negativity to some of my teammates, this is something I do not recommend doing. It is not the right way to handle the situation, even though at times it has been a relief to be able to vent. I recognize my actions have been negative; they have not helped me or my team, or my boss. It is time to make a change.
Don’t roll your eyes, it works. First and foremost, pray, pray, pray. Did I mention that prayer helps? I have noticed that on the days I don’t hand the situation over to Christ, my day goes negative. On days I do hand things over to HIM, my day goes so much better. For example, this last Monday, I prayed my whole way to work that God take over the situation. I was actually dreading a scheduled afternoon meeting with my boss. God answered my prayer; my boss took an unplanned day off on that day. God is good.
So pray for HIS strength first and foremost, He will help you through the situation as long as you let him and don’t take it back by getting all negative, which is easy to do. In my case I have to pray all throughout my day, this helps me keep focus on God not on my boss.
Your Boss Won’t Change
Next, realize that your boss has problems of his own. He is really just like you, a person who has a boss of his own to answer to. Don’t take things personally; it is just a J O B. Don’t let yourself get all wrapped up in it. You can’t change him but you can change yourself and how you view him and your job. Your focus needs to be on your personal life and making that life better. Realize that your job isn’t your life. You are working to live not living to work.
Your boss communicates a certain way. You most likely communicate in a different way. You both will probably have a different value system as well as different thought process as a whole. As long as people are involved there will be conflict. Just as there will be conflict each person deals with that conflict differently. Understand how you deal with conflict and manage that to your benefit in dealing with your boss. Don’t expect your boss to step up and manage the situation, just because he is your boss doesn’t mean he is a good leader, actually, there are very few good leaders, and just the fact that your boss doesn’t treat the team well, ensures he or she is not a good leader. You will have to be the bigger person, you will need to lead. Respect him and pray he will respect you back. (this can be difficult; did I mention you may need to pray?)
Be thankful for what you have. You have a paying job, that is all it is is a JOB, a way for you to support your family. Many people are not so lucky. Most likely the paying job also provides benefits, health insurance, retirement of some sort, paid time off. Thank God He has blessed you with the job you have. Honor Him with what He has blessed you with.
Don’t over look the benefit of the people you work with. I realize there are some people who don’t work with a good group or don’t like who they work with. I am not one of them. I like the people I work with and I am very lucky to have a teammate I can also call a friend. We have the same goal of becoming self-employed. We are able to take a break during our day and share business building ideas with each other. It is like having a coach in my corner to distract me a bit when my work day starts to overtake me and allows me to refocus and regain my balance.
Why You Work
Bottom line; remember why you are at work. You are there to provide for your family. You work to pay down your debt, build savings and enjoy life when not at work.
Don’t forget who the boss is and remember you work for him and the company, remember it is not your company. You are there to do what your boss asks you to do as long as it does not go against your personal belief system. You are there to get the job done for them to the best of your ability which is why they pay you. So while you are there, have a good attitude about it, as I mentioned above that will take prayer, much prayer, and positive self talk.
If you and your boss can’t get along, if you don’t like how they run their company, make an exit plan. I don’t ever recommend walking away from a good paying job. So make a plan, revise your resume‘, build up your skill set, and/or start looking for a new job. Personally, after 23 years at the same company I am ready to be my own boss. I have my plan, am building up my business and can’t wait to be a full time free agent. I have put my plan in motion and have put my boss at bay. I will not let my boss derail my personal and professional goals, as much as he tries.
You are better than your boss, you must be or you wouldn’t be so frustrated with him. As I mentioned, be the better person, make your plan, focus on your family and what is important in life.